Admittedly, I AM a Narcissistic little twit. It would be interesting to think that is all that is involved in my having to be exceedingly careful what I wish for.

In the past month I have been blogging in my fetish social media group how I love caretaking, how I miss it, and simply adore cooking for and feeding someone, cleaning them, etc. . I MEANT in  a romantic loving way! Because I was not specific enough mom falls from the sky and lands in my bedroom like the fucking witch in The Wizzard of Oz.

I’ve recently also spoken of my love of Asian men, I do have a bit of a fetish in my desire to recreate the intensity of my marriage with Ed where anything and everything was shared and nothing was taboo.

From the sky falls a black-eyed Asian, adorable lips, square chin, a bit shy and reserved and MARRIED.


One would think when I went for my Master level in Reiki I’d be not only more prepared for the reality of be careful what you wish for….but I’d be more in tune with what it is I really need and want.

Ok God, send Mother back where she came from. I’ll take the married Asian If and only IF he suits my needs and purposes, makes me feel good and it’s a lovely mutual exchange that hurts NO one.

I believe in the power of marriage. It outlasts sexual deviancy if you allow it to. The whole monogamy thing is fairly new. I wont cast my pearls before swine, look it up yourself. Point being, there are reasons men have gone outside the marriage bed since the dawn of time and there are reasons why wifes are GLAD they do.

I happen to be one of the ones they run to. And I don’t want them for myself. I want my own husband. Not yours. Apparently I have to be VERY specific now being a Reiki Master EXACTLY what I want. I hate to do that though. Seems very much like cheating.

Here’s a rough draft

Of some sort of Asian descent so he’ll have those slanted black eyes that make me MELT

KInky, not more nor less than I. Is that even possible? I don’t want to know.

Someone who is able to come to me at least four times a month and one of those times needs to be at least 24 hours long.

Someone who is well read, intellectual, a deep thinker, but not in a Jeffrey Dahmer sort of way.

Someone who wants to be married for life, to share all of life’s freakery and not be afraid to really lay it out there with me. But it wont hurt anyone. See how I’m trying to add all the fine print?

Someone who is able to and wants to have traditional passionate sex with me to break up the monotony. Kissing is a must no matter what. He will brush his teeth and have a clean pleasant mouth. The teeth don’t have to be perfect. Mine are not. I just want to enjoy the kiss.

Someone who will not fall apart, attempt suicide or murder or leave me should I want to play outside the bedroom with someone else in a fetish way only. I could be vanilla sex faithful forever, but kink, I could not promise that.

NIce rough draft, I think.

Now that I’ve laid that out on the line, I conscience will my mother back to her side of Oz from whence she came!



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